[VoxSpace Life] Exploring The Art Of Appreciation And Complementing The Good In Others

Life Is A Race And A Little Appreciation Goes A Long Way

We live in a society where most of us are insecure souls. How much ever we might portray otherwise, deep down we have our own insecurities which we are scared of. There are many different reasons for it, but I feel one of the biggest factors causing it is how competitive we as a society are. We have been raised with a spirit of always overtaking someone and be better than someone else. Right from the school to college to work and then marriage (an ideal life cycle society has made, which I don’t agree to), there is always a sense of competitiveness.

Having a competitive spirit is good, but not in each and every sense in life. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to this lifestyle where we don’t have time to even think about what exactly we are doing. We are just going with the lot and trying to survive in this highly competitive world. Shouldn’t we stop and think about how we are living our life? Is there any other way? Are we doing everything right?

The power of appreciation: Mike Robbins at TEDxBellevue

Why Should We Talk About It?

We as individuals are always trying to be the best among the lot around us. We get so involved in doing it that we lose our true sense following this directionless path. As I mentioned in the start, we have forgotten the Human Values. There was a time probably back in the ’90s, where meeting our friends and family was a big event we looked forward to. Sharing our achievements, acknowledging each other’s work and effort and helping each other to get better, was something we used to do.

But now it has lost. It’s not about fellow Humans anymore. Everything is us and just about our own self. We have become narcissistic and don’t care about others anymore. And this is not a good sign of our evolution.

A couple of days back, I remember going back to my college after almost two years and meeting my lecturers. They were so happy to see me and told me that it’s good to see their students come back and meet them which don’t happen much these days. We have forgotten the values people have and are so self-indulged in our work that we are losing touch with people.

Appreciation -- Where To Start?

The think the biggest thing lacking in today’s advanced generation is selflessness. It’s okay to not always think about our own self. We have stopped appreciating other people’s work, until and unless it’s benefitting us. If you genuinely like someone’s work, let him/her know. Don’t let that big ego of yours come in between. It’s a start and do try it out.

You might wonder why it is so important. We, Humans, are going through a lot of pressure most of the times in our life, owing to the competitive spirit I mentioned in the beginning. We are constantly being judged for our work and are being criticized if we make even a tiny mistake. But people often tend to not appreciate or give us a compliment when we do well. A very big problem I see around me is that people hold back from appreciating or complementing us thinking it will not make us remain grounded or stay humble. NO, it’s wrong!

The Power In Pure Appreciation - Abraham Hicks

Why Is It Important?

A small complement goes a long way. There are times when it does give some people a wrong sense of achieving something spectacular. But when you recognize a genuine effort by someone and let them know, it gives a huge amount of confidence boost to them. Also when someone compliments you for your efforts, it tends to motivate you to do more. Many corporate offices follow this, as a rule, to motivate people by rewarding their efforts.

It’s necessary to let people know that their efforts and hard work are being recognized and are not futile. Imagine you put extra effort and make something work but no one appreciates it. It makes you sad. Taking out time from our busy and hectic schedule and appreciating people around us for their efforts and good hard work goes a long way. Your relationship gets better with people and it makes both you and them happy.

I was going through a bad phase last year and I was completely clueless about what was happening in my life. And it was worse because I could never talk to anyone and share what I was feeling or seek a solution from them. Later people told me, I should have approached them and all, but no, that’s not the case. We close out on people and never notice what the other person is trying to say or mean. And during such times, if you get even a tiny complement, like, ‘Oh, hey thanks for doing this or Hey, good Job on that work’, it makes you feel good about yourself.

How to Master the Art of Appreciation

The Wrong Notion

As I mentioned earlier, we tend to not appreciate or compliment people to their face thinking it will change their attitude or make them arrogant. It does happen sometimes, but most of the times, it makes one feel more confident and happy and in turn creates a strong urge to do more and more and better work.

A small gesture from us won’t harm us in any way but can do wonders for someone else who might be going through a rough time and this one small thing can actually change their mood.

We do talk good about our near and dear ones in front of other people which they might not be aware of. But letting them know will definitely help them to know that they are doing right and make them feel secure about their own self. Let’s change the way we perceive our life and the people around us. The society needs to change its way and methods and it’s in our own hands to do that.