Suicide, Woh Kya Hota Hai?
Do you know what people say when someone they know or love commits suicide?
“S/he should have at least talked to us!”
Come on…it’s because they are not educated, dude. You can’t expect everyone to have that awareness!
Oh really! Let me tell you what my friend’s aunt, who is a PhD holder, commented on this. She said, “Arey beta medical student syndrome hai. It’s because you have exposure to all these things that you think you have them.”
Heights of hypocrisy!!
I know right!
The “educated” Auntyji could not think this way, “If only we could be a little more understanding and accepting, maybe this wouldn’t have happened..”
Acknowledging that there’s a problem and working on it is way better than saying,” Arey everything is fine with you dude!” Just saying!
What Do People Think About The Queer Community?
You wouldn’t want me to get started with that! But I will. Cause I need to increase the length of this article. Smiled? Good. That line was intended to make you do so.
On a serious note, making people talk and sensitizing them about LGBTQIA+ spectrum is as important as it is to breathe. Okay, wait! Intense hogaya. But, it’s actually almost as important. Why? Because they are as normal as us.
Oh, then why talk about them and make it sound abnormal and then talk about treating them normally?
If that is your question honey, then you’ve never come across someone who bitches about them in the most ridiculous way possible. Or you’ve never seen how most people giggle or stare at when they come across someone from the queer community. So, kid…get to know your relatives first!
Okay, but, why is she talking about suicide and then jumping to the LGBTQIA+ spectrum?
I’ll help you! More often than not, we are taught to be “normal” and now that’s where the problem lies.
How is that so?
Arey badi jaldi hey aapko…wait maa!
The problem is with the definition of the word ‘normal’, which means what the ‘average’ or the majority of the population is or does.
The exact population of the queer community in India or across the world is unknown. But, according to most of our amazingly judgemental aunties and uncles, their population is quite less, which means that they are not a majority and that according to them makes the queer community “not normal” i.e. ABNORMAL.
Now, The Connection
And now, out of a personal and second-hand experience, and after intense deliberation and contemplation, I conclude that the most general reasons to feel sad or lonely, which are the initial stages of feeling depressed and suicidal, are to not be loved or accepted and not getting to do what you want.
Unfortunately, the LGBTQIA+ spectrum has been feeling both unloved and unaccepted. And yes, most of them don’t get to do almost anything and are forced to rely on unauthorized or unavoidable options to earn their bread and butter. You wouldn’t want to hear about how they get exploited. I don’t want to say it either. Why? It’s gut-wrenching.
Ab mei kya karu behen?
Ab itna bataya hai tho ye nahi bataungi kya? If you are that person who thinks “hum tho aam aadmi hai bhai, hum kya badal sakte hei?” then this is for you. You and I, normal people, are not as normal or uninfluential as we think.
These uncles, aunties, grandpa’s, dadi’s and any/everybody, who judge any/everything without even caring to know about things, do not live on Mars. They are here, with us, around us. Sometimes you could be one of them.
So, What Should One Do?
Simple! Here are a few steps that you can follow to make the situation slightly better and help yourself as well.
How is it helping me? Well, becoming a less judgemental person makes you a better version of yourself.
Reducing the stigma around it will enable individuals to share their feelings, which is extremely important! Now, let’s get to the job!
Step no 1: Be sensitive to people’s emotions
Which means to stop judging people for how they are feeling. Your story is not their story. Your life is not their life. So, obviously, they’ll not react the way you react. Accept them the way they are and be open to their feelings.
Step no 2: Listen..always!
Your friend comes to tell you about something that’s bothering him/her. But, not listening to them and giving a bhashan straight away doesn’t help at all. It makes them feel more unheard. Instead, listen. Hear them out. Try and empathise if you can and tell them that you do so. Because sometimes people just need to be heard.
Step no 3: Encourage them to seek professional help
Now, I suppose you understood what I was trying to say. Yes? Good. No? God will help you beta! Jao jake sojao!
On a serious note, suicide and depression are serious matters. If you feel alone and want to talk to someone reach out to your friends and family. If not, reach out to Aasra at their 24×7 Helpline: 91-22-27546669
Help is always a hand away!